Dear Staff: Automated

Dear Staff,

As of today we will be using an automated service to communicate with one another. Most notably...me, your BOSS.

Button One is the "Morale" button. I have recorded some of the chants I've had the privileged to hear during my travels through Nepal, Bali, Miami and of course Mykonos. Example: "You are a wonderful being full of light, take that light and make us some money." And so on. You get the picture (now go sell it ha-ha!).

Button Two is for those days when you feel like your coworker is slacking off. Just record their name and time of slacking and I'll get right on it.

Button Three is for all your other concerns. You will hear silence for a few moments, feel free to voice whatever it is you wish to express, and then the ring tone. It's really just for you to feel like someone is THERE FOR YOU.

I think this system will work well for us. Mainly it will free me up to travel the world while you toil away.

Back to work my little work bee's!! See you in 2012!!!
Boss Man